Archive for the 'Life Observation' Category

When choosing a husband, don’t choose one who has a fantastic mom or one who has a mom who does everything for him.

For example, my nephew who has just gone overseas to pursue his studies found that he now has to learn how to make instand noodles and he doesn’t know how to use a washing machine to wash his clothes because his mom has always been there to do these simple tasks for him.

“You’re spoiling him.” I told my sister. “I pity the poor girl who is going to marry him.” Haha. I was just teasing her of course but its true to a certain extent.

In a similar vein, my husband who was not very close to his mom still finds her care better than mine. He often laments that I do not know how to care for his food like washing them properly (like his mom) and making sure he gets his fruits and taking care not to put too much sugar into his food etc. (The fact that he eats biscuits after every meal is besides the point.) He tells me that his mom told him that you should not take watermelon because the seeds are no good (so he hates it when I give him watermelons).  He tells me to get rid of the sprouts from the potatoes because his mom told him they’re bad. She’s right of course and I do get rid of them but he’d still remind me anyway because his mom told him. Beware moms. Your words will stay with your kids a whole lifetime. Lol.

So when he was down with the same bad cough as I am, he moaned and groaned and said “At least when my mom was alive, there was somone to care for me when I am sick. Now……” Aiyoyo! So of course I ignored him for the entire evening afterwards. Hahaha. To which he moaned and groaned some more the next day about how no one came to make sure he was alright while he was resting with a bad headache with fever while his wife just played with the kids. l0l. Next time don’t make such statements then you will have someone to fuss over you loh. Men! They’re such babies when they are sick.

I have the same bad cough and you don’t see me complaining as much and I have no one to “take care” of me as well when I am sick. When I cough, I have to hold on to my sides or bend over in a certain manner because otherwise my caesarean wounds or something lose inside hurts like crazy. I also have to do some quick kegel exercises when I cough or else I will leak since I have slight incontinence after the babies. That means, when I cough or laugh hard, I also have to hold on hard down there lah. Despite all this, I still have to take care of the two young kids so I can’t complain.

Well, he may be right that I do not know much about all those secret hand me downs recipes for ailments and good health. See, I even have to write a blog post to ask for help on what to do about a cough. (Thank you very much to all those who responded.) Anyway, my mom passed away young, so whatever knowledge that could have been passed down to me ended there so you can’t blame me. I told him.

I know its too late for most of the readers of this blog to choose a husband because you’ve already got one. So is your husband a “mommy’s boy”? Do you get compared in terms of cooking and doing some other stuff etc? Do you have to “compete” with MIL? Share share? We can rant together about our men here and let the rest of the men out there learn a thing or two about how to treat their wives. Lol!

We are having a rainy season again with rain mostly in the late afternoon and evenings. This is a good time for thieves. Because the heavy rain muffles out sounds and people are more likely to be in their houses instead of outside.

A friend told me that his opposite neighbour had a break-in case during a heavy rain. The thieves came and took away his tv and other big and heavy electronic equipment while he was out during the rain and none of the neighbours were any the wiser because they didn’t hear due to the heavy rain and they were all inside their homes so no one knew.

Well, thieves struck like lighting in the rain in my area during the weekend. They came and took the iron and steel drain covers outside the houses during the rain leaving big wide gaping holes in front of our houses and lots of inconvenience to home owners. (The gaps are dangerous to young children and vehicles not to mention the inconvenience and expense of getting it fixed).  About 10 houses in my row were hit and another 16 houses in another street. They did this at around 5pm in broad daylight. Imagine how bold and brazen they are to just walk up to the fronts of houses and take something that does not belong to them.

My drain cover had been stolen before and I fixed those that had screws on so mine was not stolen. But my left and right neigbours and their neighbours and neighbours all had theirs stolen. They took those that had no screws because time is off the essence. I think they were off before you can say lightning. No one saw them. Not even the guards who were supposed to be doing their rounds because during the heavy rain, they would  most likely have been trying to find shelter instead of going ronda ronda.

Sigh. I just hate it. How the crime rate has risen in recent years. Now, I don’t feel safe anymore, not even in my home which is supposed to be a safe haven. Not everyone can afford to live in gated and guarded communities but even if you were, don’t be too happy. There are inside jobs too. One condominium manager told me that they had to have guards making rounds every hour on every floor even though the tenants disliked it but they had no choice since the thefts come from inside jobs ie from people who rent out the units for several months to do their dirty job. It is hard for them to control that because the so called “tenants” dress smartly and look just like any other tenant, not thieves.

Thefts, snatch thefts etc are so common these days that I am sure you have probably witnessed one or has had someone close to you experienced it before. Care to share? We have no choice but to be more aware and alert of our surroundings from the moment we step out of our houses.

The Olympic Fever begins today on the 8th Day of the 8th Month of the year at 8:08:08pm. You know Chinese lah. Everything also must be auspicious.

I read from my kids McDonald’s newsletter that there are five mascots. They are…

1. A Fish named Bei Bei
2. A Panda named Jing Jing
3. The Olympic Flame Doll called Huan Huan
4. A Tibetan Antelope named Ying Ying
5. A Swallow named Ni Ni

Put them all together and they form the words “Bei Jing Huan Ying Ni” (Meaning Beijing Welcomes You). See? I know a little bit of Chinese. I’m not such a banana afterall.

Anyway, I am rather excited to see the opening ceremony tonight. I think the Olympic Games is a good opportunity to expose or teach the kids about the different countries of the world as well as the various types of sports. Unfortunately, I don’t have Astro, so I can only watch a delayed live transmission by RTM 1. What to do? Miser don’t want to pay. Have to watch delayed loh. Hopefully the transmission will be clear and we won’t miss anything.

For those who are interested to know more about the Olympic Mascots, you can check out this : Beijing 2008 Olympics: What are the meanings of the five mascots? Or you can simply enjoy the following YouTube video on The Mascots of the Olympic Games. The background music you hear in the video is a Chinese Folk song called “Mo Li Hua” or “Jasmine Flower”. My girl sings it in kindy. Very nice.

What makes an attractive person. To me an attractive person is one who is confident yet humble. That is a potent combination yet not easy to find.

Self image, self esteem, self assurance is the best gift we can give to our children. I hope I can teach my children to have a good image of themselves because I never had it. I’m still working on it.

I remember in college, I had a guy friend who had very poor self image. He was rich. He drove a car and the popular girls were drawn to him because of it ie they made use of him to get around. Yet he had no confidence. He started every sentence with “I’m sorry but……….” Years later I bumped into him. He had married and had two kids. He was working as a car salesperson. Yet, he still looked sorry and sad. I don’t know what made him like this.

If there was a scale of 1 to 10 for self assurance, I would rate this person at a 1 and myself at 6 maybe 7. I used to be around 4-5. I am continuing to work on it. I think blogging helps. It helps to repeat and say positive things to oneself. It also helps to have positive reinforcement and you get a lot of those in blogging. You get interaction and positive reinforcement.

However, there is always too much of a good thing. Too much positive reinforcement, too much of “You’re so good in this or that ……..” can make your head big. Then you start to write all sorts of nonsense thinking that you are so good and that you know so much etc etc etc and you start to impose your ideas on others. That makes you a boor and a snob and that is so unattractive. Modesty is still the best policy.

Like everything else in life, it is not easy to strike a balance but you must have balance in all that you do and you must have balance if you want to become a better person.

If you’re not fortunate enough to be living in a gated and guarded community, or  you don’t live in a condo, then you’ve probably heard of a security patrol team by your local Residents’ Association. These have mushroomed all over our urban residential areas or housing estates in recent years.

In the past, there was never a need for such things and I’ve never heard of them before but now, you can see security patrols  by guards hired by residence patroling the housing areas. A sure sign that crime is on the rise. Many homes now carry stickers that their house is subscribing to a certain security patrol, paying an extra RM30 to RM40 a month if I am not mistaken. My house is one of them.

However, I wonder how everyone feels about this. We feel that we want very much to improve the security in our area and that is why we dutifully pay the subscription fee for extra security surveillance. We feel that since it is a community kind of thing, it will only be successful, if everyone contributes or does their part by subscribing and so we subscribe faithfully even though, its hard for us to even pay up and after paying we don’t even have a receipt.

The excuse is that since the team is manned by volunteers and so… we’re not to have overly high expectations (like getting a receipt?). Oh well…. We do receive quarterly reports about the security in our area and we feel a (perhaps a wrong) sense of security seeing the guards patrolling our area in their motorbikes and cars and having an emergency number to call, just in case.

Yesterday, I met a friend who stays in a “crime zone” (which area isn’t that now). His neighbour’s houses had been broken in (both side and opposite). He does not subscribe to the security surveillance service that is available though. His feeling is. “What is the point anyway?” Besides, “you don’t even know if the security team is in cahorts with the burglars or thieves.” he added.

I wonder what does everyone else feel about such security patrols? Are you paying extra for it? How do you feel about this? Do you think it has reduced crime?

I keep on receiving scary emails about people being hijacked from their cars and houses being broken into. I know some of these emails may not be true but some of them come from people we actually know. I used to feel safer living in a condo but apparently even living in a condo is not safe anymore. The other day, I visited the old condo where I used to live. The maintenance person there told us that they are now stepping up security to have the guards going around floor by floor every hour because of crime. According to the guy some tenants do not like this but they have no choice. The burglars now come from within ie the modus operandi is to rent the premise for a few months, then strike when their neighbours are out.

Almost everyone I know has witness a crime or has had some personal experience. I feel so unsafe. The other day, I happened to be eating at the roadside with my handbag (I normally don’t carry my handbag when I eat at the roadside) and I was very distracted throughout my meal because I have to keep on clutching my handbag close to me and glancing around every few minutes. (I’ve had friends whose had their handphones or bags snatched while they were enjoying their meal, thats why I have this paranoia). Afterall, crime happens partly because of opportunity and we can reduce that opportunity by being more aware of our surroundings and it doesn’t hurt to be extra careful, right? Can you tell me what you have done to reduce the opportunity of crime to your person, car and home?

“He is four years old. Why isn’t he in kindy yet?”

I’ve gotten used to hearing this by now. I still hear it quite often when my 4 year old boy tags along to his sister’s kindy. I hear it from the teachers, the other parents as well as grandparents. They won’t leave us alone. Everytime I meet a new parent, they’d ask this question and look at us as though we’re weird. It annoys me to no end.

The kindy where my girl attends has 

• 1 six year old class, 
• 1  five year old class,
• 2 four year old classes,  
• 1 three year old class and
• the under threes are grouped together and considered the daycare class.

Some of them come to school with bolsters, pillows, pacifiers and are still in diapers. Some of them look like they’ve just learned to walk. Notice that the kindy has more classes for 4 year olds compared to the five and six  year olds. What does that tell you?

It tells me that the entry age for kindy has been brought down significantly. Why? I suppose its because we now live in a competitive world where both parents are working and we simply have no choice and if we don’t send our kids, they will not be learning anything at home and we’re worried they will be left behind. Yada yada yada.

I guess if one really does not have a choice, its ok if you send your child to a playschool to play. But no, the kids are now subjected to at least 3 years of kindy ie K1, K2 and K3. The learning environment is structured with many subjects like Math, English, Malay, Mandarin, Science, Moral, and there is homework and tests. (Previously there was only kindy, then there was K1 and K2, now we have K1, K2 and K3. What next? K4 I suppose.) I think its crazy.

My 4 year old is at home and they think I’m crazy. Some tell me “But you have the luxury of being home to teach him.” No, I don’t have the time to teach him all the time. Sometimes I just let him watch TV but I think thats perfectly fine for a 4 year old. So I’m probably crazy. More crazy then the parents who say “But I’m so worried my kid will not learn anything at his grandparent’s.” I understand those who do not want to leave the kid alone at home with the maid but not wanting to leave the kid in the comfort of home with loving grandparents? Hmmmm….

My girl didn’t attend any playschool, playgroup, Sunday school, nursery or whatever you call it. She stayed at home with me and went to kindy for the first time at 6 years old. And no, she did not turn out to be a social pariah. (As some predicted. Those are not my words.) No, she is not left behind. No she is not miserable in kindy. On the contrary, she is one of the above average students (according to her teacher), she has many friends and she participates in class by asking questions and she loves kindy. Right from the very first day. I didn’t have to deal with any tears.

But I was worried. I was so worried that she’d be left behind. I was worried that she’d not know how to socialise (she was a very shy kid to the extent of hiding under the table when my sis came to visit). She was very clingy too.

My boy is much more clingy than her. He is like a koala bear with super glue. But I shall not worry. I shall not worry the next time I hear “He is four years old. Why isn’t he in kindy yet?” along with the weird glances we receive. I shall be sending him next year at age 5. And thats it! Just leave us alone!

I am sure that most Malaysians has heard of the online reality show called Malaysian Dreamgirls. Its coming to an end on 29th April 2008 at the Oval, One Utama. Did you watch any episodes?

I didn’t because I don’t have the time but I did check out the website for a peek. What I did not like about it is that in some of the photos you find the girls dressing in skimpy outfits posing in suggestive and provocative poses. Whatever for? To increase ratings and voting?

Take a look at this photo gallery of the Malaysian Dreamgirls in wardrobe by Women’s Secret. I suppose its to show how the girls look posing in inner wear. However, I find that the photos are too revealing. I don’t mind the girls posing in swimwear for a contest but this looks unnecessary.

Oh well, I must really be getting old or perhaps its just the fact that I have a daughter now. And if my girl was to pose suggestively like that wearing those revealing outfits on an online site, I’d freak out!

I’d like to get some opinion on the men and women on this. Women, what do you think of those poses and outfits. How would you feel if your daughter were to were revealing clothes and pose like that on the internet for a contest? Men, you can come back and comment after you have finished wiping off the saliva from your faces. Would you allow your daughter, girlfriend to take part in the contest?

The other day, I was window shopping at a shopping complex in KL when I saw a small crowd gathering in front of a window display. Out of curiousity (KPC), I too went over to have a look. I haven’t the time to upload the photo yet so I shall describe it the best I can.

In the window display was a water tank and in it I saw two pairs of feet and lots of little fishes nibbling away at the two pairs of feet! At first I thought it was some new marketing gimmick. You know, sometimes you see magic shows and escape artists doing their act in the water.

But it was no marketing gimmick. Its the latest spa therapy. A designer spa to rejuvenate, relax and beautify. The little fish nibbling at your nerve endings is good apparently. Sorry I can’t give more information because I was too busy chasing after two kids to listen to what the marketing person was saying and by now the brochure they handed me has been torn up by the same two little kids.

Anyway this is not a review so I don’t have to worry about the accuracy. I am just speaking my thoughts. It just shows that we live in a world of added stress leading to more and more people seeking new alternative forms of treatments.

If you are interested in having your feet snacked on by Dr Fish you can check out this NST story link for a more detailed story about the fish spa.

They are catching them younger and  younger these days, the consumer ads.

I remember those days when I was wadling in and out of my gynaes clinic when I was pregnant, I received loads of product samples, milk powders, diapers, creams, more milk powders….. I don’t mind the diapers…. Anyway, the point is, all these while my baby was still snug in mummy’s tummy.

Then I remember an occassion when my children’s regular paeditrician was off and I went to another. I was horrified. His entire clinic was full of glass showcases with all sorts of consumer products on display! I am quite annoyed with paeditricians who recommend milk powders instead of promoting breastfeeding.

Recently, my daughter came home from kindy with yet more product samples. “Mummy these are party packs” she told me innocently. “And look, mummy, if you buy one at $16, you will get one T-shirt free. I want the T-shirt.” she declared. I’ll need to have a word with the principal if this continues.

Oh and don’t forget the TV. I don’t subscribe to pay TV (Astro here) so fortunately my kids don’t get influenced by TV ads. Phew! Or I’d be hassled with more “I want!” at the supermarket.

When they hit the teen years, the ads will keep on coming and it never stops and it never will. Lets face it. Young consumers means big $$$$$$.

These ads and product samples aimed at the young annoy me so especially the milk powder ones and the junk food ads on TV (with the exception of the free diapers Ahem!). What about you?

The difference between living in a house and a condo is that in a house, sometimes you have unwelcome visitors ringing your doorbell. From salespersons, to grass cutters, to surveyors etc etc etc.

So when the bell goes *DING DONG* normally what I would do is take a peek to see who it is. If its a dubious character or someone I don’t know, I usually pretend I’m not in. Being the paranoid being that I am, I’m worried that if I decline their offer for services, they may get angry and come back for revenge. Haha. No, seriously, its easier to feign being out than to answer to some of these undesirable visitors.

However, recently I found out that pretending that I’m out is not such a good idea anymore. I heard that there is a new modus operandi by those crooks who do daytime breakins. What they will do is send someone who looks trustworthy like a child or an elderly person to ring your doorbell with some excuse and if you don’t answer, they breakin into your house.

Now, what shall I do when the bell goes *DING DONG* Hmmm…. with pretending to be out no longer such a good idea, I still hate the idea of opening my doors to unwanted visitors.

*DING DONG* Oh oh. What shall I do now?