Positive Vs Negative Thingking


“I’m stuck all day in the house with the kids. There is no adult conversation. Only whining. I have no time for me. There is so much to do. I feel so tired from it all, day in and day out. Its the same everyday. Taking care of little kids 24/7 is really tiring. They are so demanding. In the evenings I have another kid to take care of. I feel so overwhelmed. So tired.  I wish my spouse could help out but he is so tired after work he usually falls asleep right after dinner! So I have to carry on even though I am tired too.”

 “I’m so lucky to spend so much time with my kids. Its really great to be with them when they wake up, during mealtimes, when they get back from school. Its fantastic to be able to be there for them, to play with them and listen to them. Sometimes they have so much energy, much more than me! The kids and I look forward to when their dad gets home. I miss him all day so its nice to pamper him at the end of the day too.  I am happy that I can be so close to my kids. I am happy to have a wonderful supportive spouse who tries to help out even though he is so tired most days he will sleep right after dinner.”

They’re both me. Hehe. So which do I choose to be? The second more positive person of course. The only time when I revert to the negative person is when I am mad (so one should always try to control one’s anger – then I get into a negative downward spiral and the thoughts spin and spin downwards negatively). The other time when I think negatively is when I don’t take care of myself enough. So I always try to take care of myself first. Then and only then will I be able to take care of others. When I feel deprived (of anything, whether its time or whatever) thats when I get caught by the downward negative spiral again.

So postive or negative? Its up to me. And I choose Positive. What about you?

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  1. jppmom says:

    I thought I was the only one have the mix thinking like this but now I’m glad, some one out there too have the thinking but I totally agree with u…d negative thinking will appear ONLY when we are not happy/sad! n I of course choose to be positive (trying very hard though)..

    *shake hands* 🙂

  2. ling says:

    same like u, when I am mad, of course negative sets in. And definitely will choose Positive as it will make life easier to move on

    Yes, it will certainly make life easier but when we get mad we forget it! 😛

  3. Sharon says:

    Ironic. I wrote a post about making choices today. I think we often have mixed feelings about many things. I’m not a parent, so I may not understand the differences between the two poles, but I do know we go through mixed reactions to everything in life!

    I remember collecting some Being Happy Quotes in my old Quotestation blog which is errmm dormant at the moment. 😉 It sums up what you are saying in your post. 🙂

  4. Cloudsters says:

    Guess one thing to do as a SAHM (which will be the prospect for at least some months, cooped up with a newborn)is to somehow find time for at least a sliver of non-housewife/motherly activities.

    Like writing a blog (just started!) or poetry or gardening.

    Have to play mindgames with oneself!

    Blogging. Check! I maintain 3 blogs regularly. Poetry. Check! I like to write the occasional rhyme. Gardening….. Hmmm thats a bit harder. First I’ll have to find myself a garden. Hahaha.

  5. Ann says:

    oh, I so understand your negative! And yes, we try to always remain positive!

    And truly agree…it is when we are sick or do not take care of our physical, emotional and spiritual well being that we tend towards the negative side…

    And yes, also agree it is a choice. A choice to be always cheerful in spirit!

    Physical, emotional and spiritual well being. Yes, yes. Thats very important. 🙂

  6. michelle says:

    Ever thot about forming a group of SAHM and gather the kids together. You can share,chat and have fun!

    The only problem with that is the get togethers are fun but it takes effort to get together and it takes time off from the normal routine. Afterwards you only come back to MORE catching up work. And someone has to do the cleaning up afterwards too. Or if you go out, you have to spend money. Hahaha. So many excuses. Look who’s being negative now.

  7. Shooi says:

    Try to be positive, and when starts to feel negative…rant out to positive thinking friends so that can start feel better again..

    Or rant on the blog, and get your own internal positive voice back. Lol!

  8. shoppingmum says:

    I’m positive on most days but when it’s a bad day, it’s really hard to perk up. Thank god I have blogs!

    Yes shoppingmum, the blogs helps perk me up when I am down. I just have to talk myself out of it by writing. Haha.

  9. allthingspurple says:

    i think lots of us are like that? some days we are blue some days we are yellow, if you know what i mean?

    some days i just cant wait to foist my kids on my sibling when they visit, its like, go, go, bring them out shopping, take them for food. here’s the baby bag !!! but some days i just love cuddling them

    Oh, you’re lucky. I don’t have anyone to foist my kids to. Haha.

  10. simon says:

    well, these days i try to be really positive, but sometimes some people just ruin it for me… like today. well, tomorrow i’ll be positive again.

    I hope you have a better day tomorrow and don’t let them get to you. 🙂

  11. karenyiau says:

    Well, I have to stay as a working mum for now due to financial need, so I choose to think positively being a FTWM loh… 🙂

    Yes, theres no point in wishing for something else, best to enjoy what you have right now. 🙂

  12. henny says:

    Why don’t you find and read a little book of Paul Arden, the title: “Whatever You Think, Think The Opposite”. I just did it last week. Good book for the ‘upside-down moody’ mommy like us. We can see one thing from really different point of view, very interesting!

    Thanks for the recommendation. Sounds like an interesting title. 🙂

  13. Moomykin says:

    I know what you mean. Most of the days I am just glad to be doing what I’m doing: a stay home mom.

    The times when I get negative is when I don’t get to talk to hubby enough, to talk about things so the clutter in my heart and mind cannot get sorted out. Then I feel upset and abandoned. (Also got external factors cos staying together with in-laws. Sticky sometimes but thankful most of the time for their care.)

    Yes, the in-laws factor can be a contributory factor either positive or negative or both.

  14. dolphine says:

    These days I will always try to think positive… but I too have negative moments, and I talked them out to my DH, let him know how I feel… then things will be alright…

    Its good to have your husband as your confidante. 🙂

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